The Gift of Asking

If helping others feels good, then one powerful way to spread that joy is by giving someone else the opportunity to help you. We often hesitate to ask for help because we fear being a burden—but under the right conditions, asking for help can uplift others too. Two Key Elements to Make It Energizing (Not Draining) - you know these! Autonomy: Let the person choose when and how they help (e.g., “any time in the next few months,” “no pressure if now’s not ideal”). Competence: Ask for something that clearly draws on their strengths or knowledge (e.g., advice, mentoring, introductions). When you ask for help in a way that honors someone’s autonomy and their competence, not only are you receiving support, you are indirectly in a way actually giving something to them - you’re giving someone the chance to feel useful, valued, and connected.